How to take advantage of shadow work and become a conscious creator of your own reality.
During Theta Healing or Akashic Records sessions, many clients I work with often want to heal their relationships with others. In addition to healing wounds and forgiving oneself and others, there is also an opportunity to become aware of and to integrate the repressed aspects. Furthermore, one can also recognise mechanisms that drive unconscious creations. When this happens, understanding of free will and the conscious creation are taken to a completely different level.
At birth, a person is an energetic and psychological wholeness, but because of various conditioning and life events, this wholeness becomes fragmented. Consequently, there is a detachment of parts of the personality, which are repressed by our conscious into the unconscious, where they form the so-called shadow.
The shadow is a compilation of all our aspects and potentials that we have lost touch with and that we are not aware of. There are not only those aspects that we commonly consider “bad”, which we do not want to admit, such as aggression, hatred, or envy, but also the “good” ones that we are unaware of or we just forgot about it, for example: need of taking care of own health, mental balance or setting healthy boundaries.
Even though we try to cut them off, they are still a part of us and manifest themselves, regardless of our own will, in the least expected situations through our behaviour and interactions with others. It’s just that we don’t see these parts as our own – we see them in the behaviour of others. Such attribution of one’s repressed aspects can be defined as projection.
The repression of own aspects and projection have two consequences. First, we do not consider these aspects as our own, so we cannot use them when necessary. For example, if someone represses his anger, in situations where he should react to the situation, but he chooses not to, which leads to aggravation of internal frustration. In addition, the repressed elements of personality do not disappear, but manifest in the behaviour of others. Therefore, a person who represses anger will also unconsciously create situations in which some people will react with anger towards that person. Only to allow the person to become more conscious of oneself and release energetic densities that were accumulated by the suppressed emotions.
So, it’s easy to see how our unconscious designs desired situations, which turn against us.
The projection can relate to positive and negative behaviours. But the consequences for the person who denies own shadow aspects, are that he creates situations that cumulate negative emotional loads that will deplete his own energy as result.
The repression and projection of a positive emotion, for example the desire of a healthy lifestyle, consists in the fact that on a conscious level we negate that we have such a desire, and our creation may be manifested by the lack of a healthy diet and physical activity. It turns out, however, that by projecting it onto others, we notice that people around us are very concerned about a healthy lifestyle. Moreover, they urge us to do the same. But instead of making positive choices we feel attacked or pressured to do something. But we ourselves are the author of these situations.
The projection of positive qualities and properties characterises by that it seems to us that there is no trace of these qualities in us, while others are endowed with them even in excess. The classic example here is fascination with another person. In fact, we are fascinated by ourselves – our repressed part. When the projection is pulled back, we are surprised that we were in love with a person who, is average and does not arouse our interest at all, which in consequence leads to a disappointment.
And finally, repressing and projecting negative traits and qualities onto others is about noticing and denying in others those traits that are really our own for example prejudice, jealousy, etc…
We then judge others without seeing these attributes in ourselves.
So what can we do about it?
- The first step: becoming aware of these repressed parts of yourself by observing your reactions with others and situations around you. If you feel a negative emotion about someone’s behaviour, congratulations, you’ve just found the part of yourself you’ve been rejecting.
- Step two: finding the reason why that aspect has been repressed and accept and learn how to love that part of yourself.
For example: if you are annoyed that someone that envies you and tries to imitate you, then ask yourself: In what other situations do you feel these specific emotions? Where did it come from? Are these patterns yours, or is it a trait of someone else from your family you don’t want to identify with? Understanding the root cause is very healing. To complete the process, accept the envious part of you and allow it to be respected and loved as all the other aspects you are cherishing.
- Step three: understanding and taking responsibility for your creation.
Ask yourself: How did I create this situation? This is where the fun begins, because it leads to realising how the mechanisms of your decisions that led to the creation of a given situation works. This will result in becoming aware one patterns and thus of how your own reality is being created by you. If this happens, you are ready to take control of the realm of your unconscious that governs your experiences.
Let’s go back to the topic of creating an envious person in your environment. Ask yourself: What led you to make certain decisions that caused envy in someone else? Why you have bought something, or why you run a business that someone envies you for? The areas for exploration may be around the issues of how a given decision came about, or why you run such a business in first place. Question yourself further: Is what you do is in line with your heart, or whether you do something because you think you have no other options? If so what patterns and mechanisms because these believes and/or feelings? Was the decision in relation certain decision about purchase dictated by inner joy, passion, care for own health or an attempt to fill up an internal emptiness, building own value through a self-branding? Is it a smokescreen for low self-esteem?
I know, I know, we are entering an uncomfortable rabbit hole, but trust me, it is worth it. It’s a journey that leads to self-understanding, and consequently to self-empowerment. Which will aid ending creation of situations that cause a vicious circle of negative emotions and thoughts, that depleting you from your life force.
- Step four: conscious creation through intention and action. Sounds simple but getting started and implementing it as the situations arise can be little bit tricky. This also requires being in the know. At this point, use all the knowledge you have gathered about your patterns which you have drawn from your inner exploration. Based on this, formulate an intention that will drive positive mechanisms, for example: “I intend that all the decisions I make are aligned with my inner guidance, I experience only authentic relationships and events that are based on respect and the manifestation of my inner truth and balance.” The action in this case will be the reversal of all unconscious mechanisms or change in own perspective.
Using previous example if someone around you envy you, change the way you think in away, that will shift your perspective to a positive one. (Here, I will reveal a little secret. ???? Everything is neutral, you assign the meaning to everything, usually unconsciously based on past experiences, and believes, that why you keep replaying certain stories). In this case, you could start wondering whether the fact that someone envy you for what you have or what you do, is a form of compliment from that person. It could be that he has a role model in what you do, even though it is based on not entirely ‘positive’ scheme – in this case envy. ????. If you take on this perspective, this will aid restoring of yourself worth and integrity. This is because you have just changed the unconscious and negative mechanism into a positive and conscious one! ????
There is also a short cut to all this, for some more adventurous souls… a completely honest conversation with a person that you’ve co-created the situation. Here you need to be very clear on how you are experiencing the behaviours of that person, what thoughts coming through your mind, what reactions, emotions, and thoughts you must cope with during interactions. But also remember to allow the other person to have space to express the same. Furthermore, you could together investigate the root cause, associated patterns and laugh at the believes that emerged as thoughts. I know, what some may think… ‘Are you fu**ing crazy?’ Nope, I had a very good testing ground and I know it works! This heals all patterns, believes, trauma and subconscious mechanisms instantly for both.
